Damoclesian swords and idiotic onions

Last summer, when I was injured, I came to the conclusion that my brand of idiocy comes in onion form. Peel off one layer and you reveal another, equally idiotic. Carry on peeling, and you will only discover more idiocy underneath.

Since I started running again, my foot has never quite stopped muttering. It will be quiet for weeks at a time, but just as I start to relax, to believe, to hope, it mutters. Instead of enjoying my tapers, I get more and more stressed, convinced that this run, this event, this day will be the day when that muttering becomes a scream, when I have to face up to having another three, or four, or five months off running.

Every time I come through an event unscathed, I relax a little, because if it were still broken, surely that XX-miler would have killed it? But then, sure as eggs is eggs, the next event approaches and the muttering comes back. With South Downs Way 50 in just under a week’s time, the muttering is louder than ever. Every step I take, I assess my foot. Does it hurt? Am I imagining it? I lie in bed and check for tender spots, but when I find them, I’m not sure if it’s broken-tender or merely bruised-because-I-won’t-stop-prodding-it-tender. I know that I should be planning for Thames Path 100, but don’t dare to think beyond SDW50. I promise myself that as soon as SDW50 is out the way, I will relax and look ahead, but I know that even if I can walk the following day, I will still be convinced that my foot will give up the ghost at some point before race day.

I can think of only two sensible ways to get rid of the sword above my head: to treat my foot as broken and rest for another three months or to persuade my GP to send me for a scan on the basis of a non-specific niggle. Given the timescales, I’m going for neither. I’m choosing the idiot option of chucking things at the sword to prove that it is firmly attached, while hoping desperately that I don’t cause it to come crashing down on my head.

I am an onion of idiocy.

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About abradypus

A Bradypus or Sloth am I, I live a life of ease, contented not to do or die but idle as I please; ... [Michael Flanders and Donald Swann]
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13 Responses to Damoclesian swords and idiotic onions

  1. shazruns says:

    Omg I thought you were all fixed. Beware when you peel onions it makes your eyes water!

  2. JovialGnome says:

    Here’s hoping it remains firmly attached! Good luck for next weekend, if I wasn’t working I would have been down supporting but will definitely be there for TP100 – if you need support, pacers or indeed pretty much anything else let me know! ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. winsometahn says:

    Fingers crossed for foot and SDW50 next week.

  4. Sam says:

    Relax and look ahead seems like the best solution.. and stop prodding it! Prodding never helps.. if you want a particular scan just go into the GP and say “I have a sore foot and I would like you to arrange x scan”. If they say no ask for a rationale, then request the refusal of care is documented on your medical records for future reference.

  5. plustenner says:

    judging by your form yesterday on that 10k, I think said foot is doing a great job ๐Ÿ™‚ see you next week at mile 27 – go Louise!!! you are our inspiration xx

  6. If the foot niggle starts screaming at you, especially in a taperchondria way, I’ll carry you to the finish and you can listen to the ridiculous moaning of my hips, knees and even my little finger which I trapped in a fridge door while buying milk yesterday ๐Ÿ™‚ enjoy the taper, take it easy and race like a legend next weekend

  7. AprilRuns says:

    A ver brave onion, though!

  8. Pingback: Still an onion of idiocy | abradypus

  9. Pingback: The picture of G Louise A | abradypus

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