By popular demand

“Rest – walking is encouraged.”

I’ve been inundated* by people wanting to know more about the miracle baked bean cure.  So, on the understanding that this does not constitute real medical advice for which you need to visit an actual doctor, I shall share with you, the one, the only, the Miracle Baked Bean Cure as shared with the world by the amazing Abradysis.

At the onset of symptoms, eat half a tin of baked beans every day for a week. If symptoms persist, double the dosage and each a whole tin of baked beans every day for a further week.  This treatment** will cure 95% of all ailments.

* Two people have expressed mild curiosity

** Or rather the body’s natural healing mechanisms


About abradypus

A Bradypus or Sloth am I, I live a life of ease, contented not to do or die but idle as I please; ... [Michael Flanders and Donald Swann]
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10 Responses to By popular demand

  1. IAmKat says:

    LOL Jools was carrying a mini-can of baked beans whilst pacing you….it’s like it’s meant to be! He’s just said he didn’t want to tell you whilst running in case it made you laugh too much

  2. plustenner says:

    can you add cheese? 🙂

  3. I was one of the people that requested to know…

    That means I’m popular!

    I’ve never been popular before!!

    • Andy says:

      As with most things there are known side effects when taking this cure-all (especially in larger doses or regularly over longer periods). You may find yourself far from popular around other people, in confined spaces in particular, if you aren’t careful. You have been warned!

  4. mercyjm says:

    Would adding toast to the cheese and the beans break the miracle? And just a drop of Worcestershire sauce? Am I meddling with things beyond my understanding?

  5. I’m liking this for it’s sheer lunacy… not the bakes beans though because they are the Devils work!!

  6. AprilRuns says:

    Sausage? Eggs? A pint of lager perhaps? This sure sounds like a proper medicine to me!

  7. blackandtabby says:

    And I was another non-believer about the miricle baked bean cure. I am now also concerned about possible side effects particularly when the dose is doubled (or ‘fondled’ as my phone just tried to auto correct it).

    Hope ititit’s working for your knee.

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