The shelf life of sacrifices

I found out this morning that although sacrifices to the gods may not expire like club card vouchers, it is as well to use them quickly for the gods have a strange sense of humour and a pedantic streak a mile wide.

As a teenager, I used to make regular sacrifices to the gods of getting out of track running, and more specifically to the gods of getting out of track running (1500m), a distance which I absolutely loathed.  This morning, as I cycled to my local athletics track for 4 x 1500m intervals, I spared a thought for that teenager and promptly caught the attention of the gods of getting out of track running (1500m), who went off to check their ledgers.

“Aha”, they said, “she has a few sacrifices remaining.  We’ll redeem them now.”

I arrived at the track to find that it was awash with contractors ripping it to shreds.  Resurfacing work. Unlikely to reopen until the new year.  Oh. 

I cycled home wondering whether I was off the hook altogether.  Alas not.  The session quite clearly specified track OR TRAFFIC FREE ROAD, and as the owner of three different makes of GPS watch and a smartphone, I’d be hard pushed to claim “inability to measure distance” as a viable excuse.  Muttering under my breath, I set off for the local park, ran my intervals and staggered home to update my sacrifices to the more general purpose gods of sloth.


About abradypus

A Bradypus or Sloth am I, I live a life of ease, contented not to do or die but idle as I please; ... [Michael Flanders and Donald Swann]
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2 Responses to The shelf life of sacrifices

  1. Norm says:

    Look at it this way – you got a nice little extra cycle ride on this beautiful November day.

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